Yes, I said cars ‚Äď not cares. It must have been a slow month for CEO Magazine because this article was a cover story of October‚Äôs magazine (page 53). Is it just me or does this smack of the ‚Äúexcessive exuberance‚ÄĚ of the 1990‚Äôs when CEOs were judged more by the cars they drove, the nightclubs they visited, or the size of their boats rather than their business prowess?
If you really want to know what car you should drive, Mr. or Ms. CEO read on.
The article starts out by stating ‚ÄúYou‚Äôve worked hard for your money. Now it‚Äôs time to enjoy it.‚ÄĚ I could suggest that a sizable donation to the Red Cross or UNICEF might make a much more lasting impression but I‚Äôd be booed out of the blog world‚Ä¶
So, what‚Äôs hot this year? Here are the magazine‚Äôs car picks for work and play, along with a short blurb about why. The blurbs are just amazing ‚Äď I swear I am not making them up. I also include the price tag for each little gem, in case you are ready to shop.
First on the list was the Audi A8 L. Not sure why it is important for a work car but they state that the car will go from 0-60 mph in 6.3 seconds. Guess it becomes mandatory if you have to run from the government if you are not in compliance. The blurb? ‚ÄúA seductive sedan with a superior user interface. Great creature comforts (!) ‚Ä¶ deliver a great ride.‚ÄĚ BI tool vendors, take heed. Not only should you deliver a good user interface but it had better be sexy and contain a porta-potty. $72.090.
Next was the Cadillac CTS-V. Yes, Cadillac, the car my old man wanted all his life. This one is a lot different from the urban assault vehicle of the past. It takes this rocket on wheels only 4.6 seconds to reach 60 mph! And this is for work? You will never be late for meetings ever again. The authors say ‚ÄúAppropriate to drive with customers or business guests‚Ä¶‚ÄĚ Only if you want to scare them silly. $53,000
Last car suggested for work is the BMW 330i which will get you to 60 in somewhere between 6.1 and 6.2 seconds. ‚ÄúReally a 5 Series in disguise. [Why the disguise?] Great performance and a solid value. More room makes it practical for business.‚ÄĚ Sounds pretty boooooring‚Ä¶ $42,865
Now for the really good part of the article: the top 7 cars for CEOs to play with.
Mercedes CLS 55 which reaches 60 mph in 4.5 seconds. ‚ÄúThe CLS is more curvaceous than the typical Mercedes. The supercharged version is the quickest Benz yet, but still fits four comfortably.‚ÄĚ Is this a car they are describing or a supermodel off her attention deficit drugs? All that for $85,000.
Bentley Flying Spur ‚Äď the name alone leaves me giggling. ‚ÄúYeah, I own a flying spur and it only cost me a mere $185,000‚Ä¶‚ÄĚ What the heck is a flying spur ‚Äď help me out here if you know. The write-up is priceless ‚Äď ‚ÄúThe accent is decidedly upper-class British [for the snobs in the audience]. Offers top speed of 195 mph for the daring‚Ä¶ a combination of lordly might and opulent luxury.‚ÄĚ OK ‚Äď this gets the prize from me. 195 mph? Where in the US are you going to try that out? Lordly might and opulent luxury? I give up.
Play Sports cars
Ferrari F430 Spider ‚Äď now we‚Äôre talking! 0-60 in 4 seconds. (I think I left my teeth back in the garage.) ‚ÄúAn almost otherworldly experience, with an intoxicating exhaust note‚Ä¶‚ÄĚ These guys have been breathing a bit too much of that note, me thinks. And with a price tag of $180,785, you better have more than smoke in your wallet.
Ford GT ‚Äď my word, a lowly Ford in the rarified air of the Ferrari! And it will beat the socks off the Ferrari (and anything else on the road) by reaching 60 in a mere 3.6 seconds. ‚ÄúThis is good old-fashioned American muscle, not Euro refinement. Essentially two seats strapped to an engine, and drop-dead gorgeous, to boot.‚ÄĚ I am not making this up. They make it sound like trailer trash finally won the lottery. How much? $153,345 ‚Äď yeow!
Cadillac again! In this category, it is the Cadillac XLR with a 0-60 mph speed of 5.8 seconds and a price tag of $76,650. The write-up states ‚ÄúBeautiful inside and outside, Cadillac got the emotionality and attitude right.‚ÄĚ Not sure exactly what emotion or attitude they are talking about ‚Äď just copping a ‚Äėtude , man‚Ä¶
Porsche 911 Cabriolet Carrera S ‚Äď ‚ÄúExotic car performance combined with everyday functionality‚ÄĚ Uh huh. Just like my everyday car‚Ä¶ 0 to 60 in 4.8 seconds and price tag? $79,100.
OK ‚Äď last one is the Aston Martin DB9 ‚Äď a measly $155,000 and getting to 60 in less than 5 seconds. ‚ÄúA four-wheeled work of art with sumptuous hand-stitched leather cabin. Top speed approaches 185 mph‚Ä¶‚ÄĚ Perhaps we should just leave it on its pedestal.
There you have it, folks. So now it‚Äôs our turn. I want you to help me come up with the top 10 cars for IT. Here‚Äôs a suggestion to get you thinking:
Volkswagen Bug: This unassuming vehicle is reliable and trustworthy. Needs minimal maintenance ‚Äď just add oil and gas and this baby just keeps going and going. Gets to 60 mph sometime today and won‚Äôt break your budget.
Can‚Äôt wait to read your suggestions for IT cars. The funniest one gets a prize!
Yours in BI Success,